Why alone time is the greatest luxury (and other life lessons my late twenties have taught me)

Last month I turned the ripe old age of 28. The big question was: how on earth did THAT happen so fast?! Last I remember, I was in New York celebrating my twenty-first birthday, charging full steam ahead. Time sure does fly.

My twenties have been quite a ride. I’ve changed my career, travelled the world, completed a degree, studied in Canada and moved to Australia, packing in as many countries as possible in between. Entering my late twenties has also been a time for reflection and changes on many levels. There are things that I now value more and different outlooks I have developed that perhaps I didn’t have back in my early twenties, which is the norm. Lately I’ve been thinking about what those changes are, and have been taking the time to reflect on them. As the year of twenty-eight beckons, dear readers, I wanted to share a few things I’ve figured out so far…

Make time for yourself (it’s not being lonely, it’s being good to yourself)

Time is one of the greatest luxuries we have. There’s a lot to be said for hedonism, but there’s a lot to be said for good health and wellbeing. Life is busy and we spend a lot of it socialising and dashing from one thing to the next. It can be exhausting. So many times I have found myself saying ‘yes’ to social engagements because I feel I have to and for FOMO (Fear of Missing Out). Nowadays though, the thought of a jam-packed schedule is daunting, not to mention tiring (admittedly I’m not 78, but I do value my eight hours a night). Don’t be fearful if you’ve not got a busy schedule 24/7 – time to yourself is one of the greatest luxuries. Make time for yourself and cherish alone time, because it doesn’t mean you’re lonely. It’s an essential ingredient to keeping yourself centered and grounded. It’s okay to be alone at times.

Don’t compare yourself to others, because you god damn rock

This, my friends, is one of the hardest things to do, but also one of the most important if you want to be happy in yourself. No one person is the same, that’s the beauty of life – you are just as unique as the next person and everyone lives life differently. You won’t always be on the same page as everyone else your age, and that’s okay. Next time you find yourself comparing yourself to someone on Facebook, one of your peers or someone across the street step back, take stock and remember: dig yourself, you are doing just fine as you are.

Cherish what you have and practise gratitude, dude

During my twenties, I’ve chosen to spend my money on what makes me happy: travel. I don’t have a mortgage yet, I don’t have a flashy car but I do have a colourful passport and a lot of amazing memories, and I’m really grateful for that. You can’t have it all – sometimes you have to choose. It’s no biggie, as long as you’re grateful with what you do have and what you’ve accomplished so far.

Exercise is an essential ingredient to happiness

I admit that often I feel I am too busy to exercise and that it often gets pushed to the bottom of the priority list when I am feeling busy and stressed. But, exercise is one of the most crucial elements to wellbeing, de-stressing and is a free-of-charge mood booster. Make the time in your busy day to get some and be good to yourself, even if it’s for ten minutes a day, no matter how simple. You can work it, gurl.

Stop spending all of your money on food, booze and shoes

Say what?! Yup, there are others things to enjoy in this life, too – invest your hard earned cash in something that will truly enrich you and cultivate the things that make you happy. Sure, enjoy the new threads and a vino or two, hell I still do, but everything in moderation, right? So many times throughout the years all of my spare cash has gone on going out to the pub, and I’ve loved it. But there are other soul-satisfying things to spend your dough on, too. Buy a new book, sign up to a new course, take up a new hobby – keep learning and enrich yourself. It’s way more valuable to you in the long run than that extra glass of wine.

Life is short; sometimes you have to take risks

Occasionally in life you have to take risks in order to live to your full potential – it’s as simple as that. It may not be easy to break a cycle and step out of your comfort zone and yes, it may be hard, but if you follow your heart and give it your all, it will be worth it. Sit through the discomfort of change and remember that you can’t let your fears control what you want to do in life. In order to grow, at times you have to take a leap of faith to figure of what really matters to you.

Know that everything that is meant to be, will be. Don’t you agree?

Until next time.

Love,

 

Image source: unsplash.com

10 Ways that writing a blog can boost your Self Confidence

Hello lovely fe-liners

In many ways my life remains pretty much unchanged since I launched my blog trawlergirl.com in January 2013.

I am still a mild mannered university administrator by day and I haven’t made my fortune just yet. I also have so much more I want to achieve where the blog and the cocktail bar business is concerned (I am my own worst enemy and a hard taskmaster).

However, there is no denying that one of the most significant changes to my life has to to be the positive effect that blogging has and continues to have on my self confidence.

So today I thought I would take the opportunity to share 10 ways in which writing a blog has helped boost my confidence.

It has to be said, I was a good faker for many years. I don’t think many people realised how unconfident I actually was! (vodka enhances confidence, albeit temporarily!)

Here goes:

1. Discovering my inner creative

Whether it was choosing a design via my blogging platform of choice, organising pretty photo’s for a post or designing a logo, blogging continues to be an adventure.

I love creating something unique to me in my own little corner of the blogosphere and the new skills I have learnt on the way has been a great way to boost my confidence levels.

2. Become part of history and create a legacy

My blog is my little contribution to society, it showcases how I see the world, how I love it to be. My blog represents my family and friends too, those who are important to me. In years to come my blog will be the virtual equivalent of a buried time capsule. That all sounds incredibly exciting, doesn’t it?

3. Inspiring others

I love that people may enjoy something I write or have a go at a craft tutorial that I have posted (note to self, I need to do more). It’s great to find the thing that really makes me tick after all these years.

4. Being Braver

This year I have attended more events on my own than ever before. The feeling has been very liberating and done wonders for my confidence levels. I’m no longer the person hanging on to someone else’s tails. I’m out there, on my own, and loving it.

5. Public speaking

I had actively avoided public speaking for years. The fear of making a complete fool of myself would have me hiding or squirming in my seat at events where I was possibly required to stand up and give an opinion.

I figure now that I make myself heard virtually via blogging, so why not do it in the real world too?

6. Knowledge is Power

Blogging is not just writing and creating, it’s the reading too. I read much more now than I ever did.

I feel empowered, better informed and more ready to make the right decisions for me and my family. I fear I would still be in the land of ‘trying to please everyone, but myself’ had I not chosen the blogging path.

7. Beginning to feel like an ‘expert’

A bit of a bold statement but as I compile more information about the cocktail bars and accessories via the blog I am publicly sharing my knowledge, thus (hopefully!) making me a ‘go to’ person for all things related to the world of ‘vintage entertaining with sparkle’.

8. Being more open

There is something very liberating about writing and opening up to the world. I feel more open and honest with those closest to me about my thoughts and feelings. If I’m hurting, I will let those people closest to me know instead of pretending everything is ok.

9. Being part of something special

I have suffered constantly over the years with the ‘I can’t, I’m not good enough’ syndrome and still now have to work hard on overcoming self doubt. Becoming a part of the Fe-line blogging community helps to squash many of the voices via fantastic articles written here, that remind me I am not alone.

10. Not being afraid

Of major changes, of the unexpected, of going with the flow and embracing everything that life is going to send my way.

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So, if you are hesitating about writing your own blog, be brave, seize the moment, start reaping the rewards and begin to experience a new kind of freedom. The freedom to be you.

Already blogging? Is there anything I’ve left out? What positive feelings have you experienced?

Hit me up in the comments box below. I would love to know!

Love and lots of sparkles,